10 Hours In New York City

It finally happened. 

I went to New York City.

I honestly went with a different set of expectation, and I genuinely didn't expect to like it as much as I did. But it was perfect. 

My cousin, Danny, got invited to go preach at a youth camp, and we decided that we'd take a little trip into the city on Sunday afternoon. 

My best friend booked us a hotel in New Jersey, as it was cheaper and had a shuttle we could take into the city (we thought we would use it. We did not). We were going to go see the Statue of Liberty first, however, the New Jersey turnpike decided to hold us captive and not let us pass.

Let me tell you something: I do not understand that thing, and I'd even go as far as saying that I hate it. It's really confusing, there are roads leading in all sorts of directions and people are not nice. People honk at you for trying to merge into their lane. It's apparently extremely unreasonable to expect them to let you in. How dare you not only use one lane until you get to your destination.

Oh, and the honking is ridiculous. Honk for this, honk for that. You'd think they had a bumper sticker that said "if you are breathing, honk!" -- you might think I'm exaggerating, but I kid you not, at one point, I had to pray for the Lord to touch the heart of the man in the other lane to let us merge. I am just thankful that I wasn't driving because I would have burst into tears (thanks Danny -- he doesn't read this blog, he'll never know). 

We ended up on the turnpike four times in one night, literally from 5 pm to 11 pm. Finally, after a lot of dancing, laughing and yelling back at the cars, we decided to end the night. We ended up getting some Taco Bell, and heading back to the hotel to watch friends on TV before going to bed. We did not make it to NYC on sunday night. But we made it bright and early on Monday morning and it was a splendid ten hours. Seriously, we spent ten hours in NYC. How funny is that? We tried to do as much as we could. I wanted to go to the Guggenheim, the Met and Times Square. We only go to see the Times Square, and only because we parked near there.

Side note: Times Square is weirdly underwhelming. I felt a little let down to be honest. 

But we saw other great places, ones that I wouldn't have seen on my own. We took a hop-on-hop-off bus tour (it saved us from having to walk from place to place) and we got to see the city in a day. We went to the 911 Memorial, Oculus Station, Grand Central Station, The Statue of Liberty, Rockefeller Center, the lower level of the Empire State Building. We took a boat tour that showed us stuff and taught us some history. I learned that "my husband", Hugh Jackman, lives in NYC in some village. The bus tour takes you everywhere. 

Each building is unique and its own thing. We went to see the Flat Iron Building (I don't know if that's one word or what) but that building is trippy and I felt like I was in inception. I'ts just a wonky building and it makes my stomach feel funny. I don't know. Nobody every described me as normal. The day was perfect. We ate breakfast at the hotel, and didn't eat lunch until about 4pm. I simply can't wait to go back. There is so much more I still got to do. I still have to go the museums and I still have to see a Broadway show. Can this school year be over so I can start adventuring? 

Look how pretty it is: 

Until next time New York.  

Let's go on another adventure. 

- R. 

Story Time: Poetic Skeletons

My personal e-mail is full of poetry I used to write. Some of it is real depressing, others are SO cringe worthy. Others invoke a certain type of nostalgia, the type that kind of reminds you of the feelings you had when you wrote it and incite you feel it all over again. Poetry used to be my own personal therapy. I wrote it down, because I didn’t want to say it aloud. I don’t know where along the line the opposite happened. If I could, I’d climb some rooftop and yell all my emotions off of it. I’m a talker. I know, surprising! But I want to talk about it all. I want to say exactly what I think, feel, want, need, hate, love, etc. It’s who I currently am. My software provider is creating an update that will help put some sort of filter on this mouth.
 
However, until then, I’m a huge advocate of talking. I want to talk, because talking gets me to the bottom of things. When I'm not talking, something is really bothering me. When I was younger and clearly depressed, I wrote it down. That’s why my personal e-mail saddens me. I keep it because it reminds me of how far I've come, while also reminding me of what a complete tool I used to be. Don’t judge me though, sometimes I was just sad. I wish I could share some snippets with you but you might laugh at me. Although, when has that ever stopped me before? This is me being vulnerable about my past, while also poking fun at myself. These are some real snippets out of the personal vault. These ones made me laugh out loud or chuckle. I will also write down my present day reactions.

1.

Yuck. What is this? No, honey, no. That little blood pump in your chest cavity is only attached to arteries and vessels and stuff.

2.



When I was little, I used to always yell at my parents (after they got me in trouble),"I can never have a happy day." Apparently, I didn't outgrow these dramatics for a long time. I'm still very dramatic, except now, I've experienced true happiness.

3.

This.Doesn't.Even.Make.Sense. Clearly I was taking some creative liberties. But maybe it was just one of those, "it's too good to be true" or "it's crazy, so crazy, it just might work" things. Who really knows. But whatever was happening was so real, it just couldn't be. How could it be? Denial is a gift my friends.

4. 

Once again, my affinity to speak about things I don't understand started young, and has stood the test of time. I clearly had never experienced a heart break. Those things suck. Avoid at all costs. Oh, and if you can avoid making mistakes, do that too. Sheesh Ruth, terrible advice.



Listen...

We all have weird depressed skeletons in our closets, mine just happen to be really poetic (haha). Genuinely though, I just want to let you know, that you can really become a better, mentally stable human if you try. Just kidding (but not really).

I just want to say: everything always seems like a mountain, even when it's a small hill. And even if it is a mountain of a problem, you can still climb it. I know that all those aforementioned moments of pure angst and melancholy are funny now, but back then, they were the biggest deal of all time. Can you imagine if I would have given up in any of those moments, I'd still be living alone in a valley somewhere, shaded by the massive mountain of problems, in a house full of sadness, with a drinking well full of my own tears and... well, that took a steep turn, you get the point.
I'm just here to tell you to keep going, one day, you'll be able to look at those mountain in your rear view mirror and enjoy the view. Sprinkle some hope and Jesus on it, you'll see the magic that can come from that.

Talk to you later,
R.  

Let's Chat: Sibling "Rivalry"

Today’s post is inspired by my co-workers conversation. She was telling me how she’s amused by these hockey coaches she knows. Apparently the other day, they got into a massive yelling match during a hockey game, mind you, not an adult hockey game, but a hockey game of eight year olds. And that now, they are the best of friends, who meet up every week. She’s genuinely confused, and doesn’t understand how that can happen. To tell you the truth, I’ve known that guys are this way for a while. They can literally get into a brawl, only to be besties a few hours later. But is this the case for all men? Is it just some men? I don’t know. Maybe you should ask someone that knows, because I genuinely know nothing.

I grew up in a household of men (previously known as boys) and I’m still confused most of the time. So I decided, that in honour of a belated “national sibling day”, I’d have a candid discussion about what it’s like to grow up with brothers and how it didn’t help me at all for the real world. First, I guess I should describe what my relationships with my brothers are like. We aren’t on speaking terms. . . Just kidding! As if! My family talks all the time, all day, I genuinely wonder whether we’ll run out of stuff to discuss sometime. Anyways, I’ll stick to the subject. Here are some basic stories, so y’all can get an inside view of the Alvarez (my last name, icydk) household:

My one brother is a complex creature. Always trying to pretend he’s not sensitive, but really he is. It’s a fine line. It takes years of experience to realize when you’ve gone too far, or when you haven’t gone far enough. For example, one time, we were arguing. And mid argument, I became a total girl, and went for the jugular. I spilled the beans about a certain person in his life, who was not being very nice to him. There could have been one million other times, where I could have let him know the situation, but instead I waited for an opportunity that gave me the greatest reward. Apparently the reward was winning this dumb argument.
Side note: Don’t judge me. You know you’ve all done this before. We wait. We keep it in our arsenal, and we pull it out in times of war. Don’t even pretend.

Anyways, I realized the time was now! And well, it had the desired effect. He immediately shut down and stopped talking to me. Now, I thought that this would last for a couple hours. Oh boy, I was mistaken. He gave me the silent treatment for AN ENTIRE WEEK. Guys, I mean… I tried talking to him the next day and he was the ice princess ...I mean, Mr. Freeze. On the flip side: He does NOT enjoy being ignored. I would get mad at him often, and I’d go to my room, slam the door, and linger in my own puddle of angry tears (nothing was ever serious enough to warrant this type of lunacy but hey, I was little) and he’d trot up the stairs and knock on the door and ask me to hang out. I would say no. and he’d sit in front of the door and every few minutes ask “how about now? We could be doing so much right now”. Uh hello young man, I am doing a lot right now, I’m over here being mad. He is a solid bud though.

Now my other brother, he’s a gem of a human being (sarcastically and genuinely). I remember one time we were mid fight, I’m pretty sure about who was allowed to choose what we would be watching on the television. And well, I’m up for a good argument every now and then, and was not budging from my position and my seat. Y’all know that we have “our spots” on couches and such. Apparently, I was in his spot. He got up and he grabbed me by my ankles (how rude!) and yanked, yes, YANKED, me onto the floor! Guys, this is hilarious. Like, just use your imagination. Like who does that? Oh, that’s right, my brother. But like I said he’s a gem. On another occasion, I was crying (I don’t know if these stories really put me in a shining light) about probably not being allowed to eat a cookie or something, and he saw me. He called me over, and he allowed me to sit beside him as he played his piano. He played until I stopped crying, gave me a hug and told me that everything would be fine. Everything was indeed fine, but I always remember it. He was also the only family to see my crying after a boy hurt my feelings. He sat down and explained to me that he knew I’d make someone very happy one day, if I treated him as well as I treated them (my brothers) he’d be very lucky dude (cue the ‘awws’).

And this is why friends, I don’t claim to know anything. People are all different. No matter the gender. The real question I often wonder about is how did women end up getting the label of being complicated? Do you know how many conversations I’ve had with these guys and have left super confused. Legitimately all the time. However, there is no better feeling in the world than knowing you got two big dudes that will have your back at the end of the day, and I guess that makes it all ok. Ugh, all this sap is making me nauseous.

In conclusion, I have two pieces of advice.

1. Mothers: Listen, I’ve seen a grown man cry for their mom. I’ve had to go and call my mom and be like “mom, your son is wondering why you aren’t holding his hand right now?” Just because they are boys, it doesn’t mean they are emotionless. If anything, they might be more emotional. Establish a relationship, let them say what they feel; there will be a moment when he is 30 where he’ll call you crying. But don't you worry, his sister will be in the background calling him a big baby.

2. Sisters: learn to be a “bro”. Don’t be so sensitive. Try to take interest in the things they like. Trust me, if you do, they’ll hang out with you more. And give you lunch money and beautiful watches for your birthday (but like, don’t just do it for that. I’m just saying it’s a perk). Also, sometimes they want to talk to someone, someone that understands the “emotional stuff”. This will also give you some leverage for the next argument. Bahaha, just kidddding.  Do it because you love them. Also, you might need a male perspective sometime, and who better to ask than someone who cares about you.

Well, hopefully the next post isn’t as gross as this one. Tell me about your sibling relationships. Should I have wished for a sister?

Chapter 3: Flaws and All

My face looks like a pepperoni pizza. But not a good one. I've had about 7 chocolate bars in the last fifteen days. On my thirteen day "vacation", I ate a cupcake every s i n g l e day. I have no regrets. But this is why my face looks like a pepperoni pizza.I only have myself to blame. I'm also a little bit stressed. School has not been the greatest ride lately. And so I've been eating a lot. Because food makes me happy, ask anyone. Well, what can I do about it?

I am a flawed human being. So many flaws. If I could talk about twenty seventeen, it'd be about how flawed it was. Lots of things didn't work out great, a lot of the time I felt confused, lost and lonely. The year had many times where I thought, "this year sucks." And yet, I ended this year on a high note. W H A A A A T!

Listen, if you look at me, you can see seventy-five millions things that are wrong with me. I'm too short, I'm too fat, I have pepperoni face, I'm pale white, my teeth aren't straight, I have bad skin, my shoulders are too wide and ....  so many other things. And yet, there are many days where I feel like I am a solid eight out of ten.

Just look at my life, you can see another thirty million things that are wrong. I still live at home with my parents, my bank account is always sad, student debt, I still have not graduated, I don't have a co-op yet, I'm still a single pringle and it's probably because of my pepperoni face (joke). Yet, I'd give my life a five-star rating. God has been good to me.

Now, lets analyze my personality. It also has like four million things wrong with it. I'm too loud, I'm too honest, I'm a back-talker, I can be a negative nancy, sassy sally, prude patty, rude ruthie (haha). When I get mad, I get mean. I often hold grudges and anger is my comfort zone. But, it' still my very best asset and I'd give it an A plus-plus.

Do you think I'm being a little too hard on myself? Did you think all the aforementioned were flaws? Did I bring attention to things that you didn't even know about me? (if that didn't happen, please exit the premises) 

For whatever reason, I’ve been extremely hard on myself. Due to that, I’ve accomplished a few things. Because when you keep insisting on something, you tend to get it. But it sort of takes the joy out of everything. Flaws will always exist. We are flawed people, but we can’t have tunnel vision when it comes to our flaws. They are not all that we are. I've been so hard on myself this last year, getting really frustrated over letting everyone down, myself included. And it's made it really hard to enjoy the year. So this year, I want to change that. I promise to work hard on everything I do, including this blog, but to also to r e l a x and cut myself some slack. I have a good feeling about twenty eighteen y'all. Be kind to yourself and one another. 

 

Happy New Year. May It Be Blessed & Happy.

10 Day YOU Challenge: 3 Films.

'Appy Tuesday Mate(s)

I've gone home to london for a week and I worked today from 8 am to 7 pm and was super exhausted!

I am also doggy sitting my brothers dogs and so I went over to his house and remembered HART OF DIXIE PREMIER!

(if you haven't seen this show and love LOVE and southern hospitality, WATCH IT)

Clutch, timbit and Bentley!



so, i tuned into that while eating a subway sandwich.
Now I'm waiting for my clothes to dry so I can shower and head to bed. I have another long work day tomorrow.

Anyways, its the 10 day YOU challenge again and we're at THREE FILMS.
I'm so sad that its almost over but its been really fun! Its been keeping my blog alive the last couple weeks cause I've been so out of it. Need to get bloggin'
I hope you enjoy!

Number One.

Lion King.
Its been my favourite me since the very first time I saw it.
I sing the songs, I quote it.
I mean, c'mon!
Hakuna Matata!!

Number Two.

Sweet Home Alabama

"Why do you want to marry me anyway?"

"So I can kiss you anytime I want"

*Sigggh!  Enough said!

Number Three

(Recent)

The Avengers.
Best superhero movie I've seen.
It was so funny, I died.

"We've got a hulk"

Others: Pride and Prejudice, Anchorman, Harry Potter, X-Men First Class, Star Wars and Lord of the Rings, Megamind, Swing Kids, She's the Man, Pearl Harbour and 300.

 

10 Day You Challenge: Seven Wants.

It's TUESDAY again!  

*(Small Dance)* 

I was sitting at Applebee's yesterday with a couple of my friends and we were talking about blogging. You may know Cindy and Sarah. (if you don't, check 'em out) 

Anyways,
I was telling them how much I love Tuesdays and how this week it was seven wants. I'm very excited, I think I've been thinking about it all morning!

Seven

To be healthy. I've been sick for about a little over a week. And its driving me nuts. Stuffy nose, ear aches, sneezing, itchy eyes and headaches! I think this is my biggest want at the moment. 

Six

These shoes.

Five

a tour of England.

Four

I wouldn't mind this kind of body

Three

Clear skin. I've been dealing with breakouts lately and its crazy. I mean I'm 22 years old, isn't this teenage problems? 

Two

Singing lessons. I am now part of my church choir and we sing but I feel as if I'm the weakest link.

I can hold a tune, but I still have a lot to learn.

One

A piece of cake. I mean, a good piece of cake! 

Have a happy week everyone! 

10 Day You Challenge: Eight Fears

Eight Fears

Before I start I just wanted to say how much I look forward to Tuesdays. Is that weird? 

I'm always so excited to see what people will write as their answers. Is that weird?
Anyways, I just like Tuesday.
Although today I had an exam, and I didn't realize it.
He changed our normal Thursday to Tuesday this week for personal reasons and in my head I thought I had a couple days to go over my notes. I was wrong.
So, I'm just going to hope for the best. I didn't feel totally stupid. So that's okay right?

Eight

Snakes. I don't know when I developed this fear. I've never been attacked by a snake or even encountered one that was on the loose and wild and venomous.I can't even watch them on TV or see them at the zoo. I think they are ugly. They don't have legs or eyelids.

 ItsSsSs just wrong. 

Seven

Falling. I don't like roller coasters for this particular little detail. Whose idea was it that dropping at high speeds was fun? I can do heights, just not the dropping.
Although, I do want to skydive at some point in my life.

Six

Losing my family. It would be like losing my life. 

Five

Dying in a car accident.
I had myself convinced for the longest time that this was the way I was going to die. I got into a car accident on the highway when I was 16. Rolling and crashing in barricades and landing in a ditch are not my thing. Which is probably why I despise driving.
I also think I'm going to get run into when I drive to school on the highway EVERYDAY.
Good thing I trust in the Lord.

Four

Not being successful at something in my life. I want to achieve success at something I love.

Three

This fear probably comes from watching criminal minds or something related to that. I hate walking alone to my car in the middle of the night. Its crazy I know. But when I have to, I run. 

Two 
That I'll  be alone forever. This comes and goes depending on the day and how I'm feeling. Sometimes being alone is what I want, and sometimes I want someone. Its an odd thing. 

One 
That I won't represent God in the way that I want. I want to represent love, hope and faith by how I look, speak and act. I fear that I'll let the worst of me come out and shine more then the best of me. But I can DO all things through Christ.  

10 Day You Challenge: 9 Loves.

“Tis better to have loved and lost

                              Than never to have loved at all.” 

One.
God.
I love Him. 

 

 Two.
Cake AND ice cream. Your probably thinking that's two things. But here's the deal. I love them equally. I can't decided which one is better because there both awesome. I mean, don't make me choose! DON'T! 

                                        Three.

                                        A good country song.

Four.

Sunglasses.
I have this sort of obsession with sunglasses! Maybe cause I drive so often I realize how important they are. And they come in so many different shapes, sizes, colors and designs. You can express yourself through your sunglasses!

Five. 

Superhero TV shows and movies.
Like, is there a reason why all superheros are hot and muscular?
All I'm saying is I love the view, the story lines and all the nerd people you watch them with.
Love!

 



Six.
Shoes.
You can gain weight, lose weight... get taller, shrink if you truly like.
They will probably almost always fit you!

                                                    Seven. 

A good book on a rainy day. (or any day)

There is nothing like investing time into a story that is so much more exciting and meaningful then your real life. 

 

                                                       Eight.

Sweaters.

I love summer time. But sweaters are my absolute favorite. Comfortable and warm!

                                                                              

Nine.

Zumba.
Who says running the way to go?
All I'm saying it doesn't matter if you can't dance, its still fun!

All the girls want...

pretty clothes, pretty bodies and handsome boyfriends.

And all I want to do is eat.

Is something wrong?

(Just because its funny)

I’ve probably tried to lose weight like 20 times in the last 10 years.
I’ve probably tried 5 different diets, 7 different workout routines and plain old running till my legs fall off.
I’ve given up and started up again.

I have this weak spot for ice cream and cakes.

I’ve tried to convince myself that it’s for health and sometimes to give myself a boost of confidence.
I’ve tried to do it out of revenge because of a broken heart.
I’ve tried to do it to gain a boyfriend with my new physique.
I’ve tried to do it out of anger, sadness and loneliness.
I’ve tried…

I have this weak spot for ice caps and burger and fries.

I’ve decided that I’m just going to be fluffy and satisfied.
But I walk into a mall or my favourite store…
and the clothes don’t fit right.
so I’ve tried to do for clothes.

I have this weak spot for chocolate bars and donuts.

So what does one do when you've tried and tried?

 you try, try, try again! So todays goal: do something active. and have fun while doing it!
who said it couldn't be fun?

I wish someone would say:

Wish me luck would ya?

Links: Life Lately, motivation mondays